Pairing/ Characters: Yunjae
Genre: AR, Crack, Romance
Warning: Bad writing???
Inspired by: The Nice Things We Don't Have
Fiddling with the camera, Jaejoong shifted backwards quickly with a jaunty wave at the device.
"Hello everyone! It's Jaejoong here, and today, er we'll be doing the boyfriend tag that many of you have been asking for." The brown haired boy smiled as he gestured for his boyfriend to enter the frame.
"So guys," Jaejoong began with jubilant jazz fingers as the other boy settled beside him on the edge of the bed. "This is my boyfriend," he sing-songed as he lopped an arm around the boy's neck.
"Jung Yunho, say hi," Jaejoong coached as his boyfriend beamed at the camera with a perfect smile.
"Hello everyone, I'm Yunho, and I was the one who printed today's questions," Yunho revealed with a grin as Jaejoong groaned before shoving his boyfriend in the shoulder.
"Camera whore!" He accused loudly as he threw his boyfriend a dirty look.
"How can I be a camera whore when I'm almost out of the frame?"
"How do you-" Jaejoong asked before looking at the display screen with a soft curse. "Sorry babe," he apologized quickly as he shifted nosily to his left.
"So this is, my absolutely perfect boyfriend." Jaejoong recovered, laughing when Yunho nodded enthusiastically to the compliment. "Moving on to the questions that Yunho has oh-so-lovingly prepared today," Jaejoong paused as he brought the slightly crumpled paper up to show the camera.
"Wow, its really long," he commented as he scanned through the list while Yunho suppressed a laugh to his side.
Jaejoong narrowed his eyes before turning to scrutinize his lover. "Dude!"
"Sorry! The difference in contexts set me off!" Yunho defended as Jaejoong rolled his eyes in exasperation.
"It's a different tone," Jaejoong argued only to receive a pair of raised eyebrows.
"It's just shock and wonder."
Jaejoong shook his head before leaning into Yunho's space as his hand ran up the front of his boyfriend's jeans. "Wow, it's really long," he repeated, his voice lower and breathier as he licked his lips in mock wonderment.
"Yeah," Yunho stammered as he swallowed heavily. "Yeah. DIfferent," he nodded quickly before pushing his boyfriend's roaming hands away. Another few more rubs and Jaejoong wouldn't be able to film until much later.
"Sorry," Jaejoong coughed as he straightened before nodding at the camera. "We'll be cutting that out."
"Anyway, first question for the day. Where did we meet?" He wiggled his eyebrows as Yunho laughed easily to his side.
"We've been neighbours since we were four, so we pretty much grew up together." Yunho paused when Jaejoong squeezed his thigh endearingly.
"My family had just moved in then, so I guess that we met on Jaejoong's lawn when my mom brought my sister and I to greet the neighbours?" He nodded as he smiled fondly at the camera, inundated by memories.
"Jaejoong was so excited to meet his future boyfriend that he jumped me on the spot," Yunho finished, mimicking a leap with his both hands, flashing his teeth as he tossed his head viciously.
"False!" Jaejoong yelled as he leaned forward animatedly, desperately trying to salvage his image. "I was sick of playing with my sisters and there were no other boys my age on the street before Yunho arrived." He clarified with an unconscious pout.
"I was so frightened, though," Yunho interjected gravely as he looked into the lens solemnly.
"Lies!" Jaejoong cried as he shook his boyfriend by the shoulders.
"Jaejoong can be very tenacious when he wants to be." Yunho interjected as he smiled despite the commotion about him.
"Cutting that out!" Jaejoong flailed widely as Yunho leaned in for a kiss.
"Just riling you up, darling," Yunho teased before reaching to muse his boyfriend's hair. Yelping before he rearranged his hair in the display, Jaejoong threw his boyfriend a dirty glare as he collected himself with a sharp cough.
"Okay, next. When was our first date?" He asked with a chuckle as he set the paper onto his lap.
"This is highly contentious because Yunho here, believes that our first date was after he kissed me, where we laid on his bed, talking about feelings."
Jaejoong rolled his eyes as he wagged his index finger. "Which is false because that does not constitute as a date. A date is when you present yourself to the public under the pretense of normalcy." He paused as he met Yunho's amused eyes with an eye roll.
"So therefore, our first date was when he turned up for my family gathering the next day as my boyfriend."
"Which I would disagree," Yunho added casually while Jaejoong reviewed the paper without protesting, having heard the argument ad nauseum.
"Next, we've covered this, kinda. Where was your first kiss and how was it." Jaejoong recited as he motioned for Yunho to answer.
"Our first kiss was when I kissed Jaejoong twenty months ago to shut him up when he kept going on about dongbangshinki's Uknow. That guy is highly offensive." He made a long face with a shake of his head.
"It was in my room, and it was a very, very annoyed kiss." He blushed a little as he realised the gravity of the words. "And we were each other's first kiss," he mumbled as he looked down at his lap.
Jaejoong cooed as he pressed a kiss onto Yunho's cheek with a smile. "It was very surprising, and I was shocked by how much more I wanted from him." He laughed as he tucked his boyfriend closer by the chin to steal a kiss from his lips.
"It was really memorable." Jaejoong affirmed before breaking into a grin. "Yunho is an adorable green eyed monster," he teased, yelling when Yunho tackled him. Pinning Jaejoong to the bed, Yunho pressed opened mouth kisses to his neck.
Moaning at Yunho's hands that were ghosting the erogenous zone on the side of his torso, Jaejoong began to buck against his boyfriend as he pulled the other down lower by the neck, freezing when a paper crinkled between them.
"Shit," he cursed as Yunho's eyes widened. "You're so distracting!" Jaejoong complained as he sat up after his boyfriend.
"I'd say the same about you," Yunho retorted as Jaejoong smirked before facing the camera with a deep sigh.
"Okay, so how did you know I was the one?"
"This is somehow mildly invasive." Yunho commented as Jaejoong shrugged before motioning him to continue.
"I knew that Jaejoong was the one because we're like two halves of a whole." He said in a tired voice, shaking his head at the cliché spilling from his mouth. "I know and love his quirks, while he pushes me to accomplish better things. I made the step because I wanted more. I wanted to press kisses into hair while holding him."
Yunho shook his head before looking at his boyfriend. "That was corny, wasn't it."
"Nah, it was lovely," Jaejoong affirmed as he smacked a kiss on his boyfriend's lips. "I love you," he stated as he drew back before lifting his paper once more.
"I love you too," Yunho returned as he leaned in to nuzzle against his boyfriend's hair.
"I'm probably going to regret asking this question," Jaejoong sighed before continuing. "First impression of me?"
"Monster child," Yunho replied easily as Jaejoong stared at the camera with an I-knew-and-this-still-sucks-so-badly expression.
"To me you were salvation," he shook his head returning to the paper as Yunho pressed kisses to his jaw. "Sap," Yunho murmured as Jaejoong tried to pull away.
'Behave," Jaejoong scolded as his boyfriend froze before looking up.
"Sorry," Yunho apologized as he pulled a long face. "I just really like to touch Jaejoong." He admitted innocently as Jaejoong looked exasperatedly at the camera.
'Honeymoon period," he clarified as Yunho laughed beside him. "Nextttttt, when did you meet the family." Jaejoong looked frowned at the camera for a few moments before moving on with an incredulous eye roll and heavy exhalation.
"Who said I love you first and where?" Jaejoong recited before setting his paper down. "I did, during my family gathering a day after we got together. I realised how much I liked introducing him as my main squeeze, plus I knew that I couldn't get any happier, so I told him that I loved him."
"It was very sweet," Yunho affirmed as he took the paper from his boyfriends lap. "What do we argue about the most?"
Jaejoong hummed as he tried to sieve through his memory for a recent argument. "When I sleep really late?"
Yunho nodded in agreement as he rolled the paper in his hand before thwacking his boyfriend's head with it. "It really drives me up the wall when he stays up to do things he should have done during normal hours."
Jaejoong shrugged unapologetically as Yunho sighed in defeat.
"For me, we argue when he does things for me obsessively." Jaejoong shook his head before repeating 'obsessively' for emphasis.
"Like Jaejoong, I got a shirt for you, Jaejoong I borrowed a book for you, Jaejoong I made a burnt lunch for you, Jaejoong I got your bag for you, Jaejoong I replaced your toothpaste for you." He wrung his hands exasperatedly as he shook his head at the at the camera.
"He treats me like a freaking child so often, putting pressure on me to be as perfect, which is annoying. I don't ever understand his complex, like at all." Jaejoong complained as he pushed his boyfriend's hand away as he tried to convey his frustration.
Yunho pouted as he tried to reclaim the warmth under his boyfriend's shirt. "I just want to do things for you," he whined as Jaejoong rolled his eyes.
"See? It gets downright creepy sometimes even, because seriously. And it's worse because I feel so ungrateful when I complain even though I actually appreciate them. However, I would definitely appreciate them more if he dialled them down." He groaned as he batted Yunho's hands away once more.
"Somehow, it's like having an overgrown puppy that doesn't understand commands," he rolled his eyes as he gave up, allowing Yunho to stroke his abdominal muscles with a lazy smile
"Who wears the pants in the relationship?" Yunho recited as he picked the paper up with his spare hand before shaking his head.
"No one," he replied as he began to move on to the next question.
"We don't wear pants," Jaejoong interjected solemnly with a sage nod.
"What's the one food that I don't like? For Jaejoong it's octopuses or squids," Yunho stated as he counted off on his fingers at the camera. "I've been helping him with those chewy stuff since we were young."
Jaejoong made a noise of agreement. "Those are gross, alright. As for Yunho, he doesn't fancy the bloody taste of innards."
Yunho faked an exaggerated shudder as he continued. "Okay, if I was collecting anything, what would it be?"
"I'll probably be collecting-" Yunho frowned when his boyfriend begun. "You're supposed to talk about my collection." He reminded with a firm poke to his boyfriend's belly.
"Yeah," Jaejoong laughed as he pat his boyfriend on the knee while his eyes twinkled devilishly at the camera.
"I'll be collecting Yunho's lost possessions," he yelled as he began laughing when his boyfriend squeezed his abdomen
"I swear, man, I swear," he gestured excitedly as he pushed Yunho away from the camera's line of vision. "For all that Yunho does for me, he's such a loser. Half the time he never manages to locate his wallet, keys or phone," Jaejoong fell over laughing as he thought about the times Yunho had flitted about his room, tearing his things down in search of his belongings.
Yunho huffed in exasperation. "It's normal, alright. It totally is," he insisted as he held his boyfriend down.
"But whatever, Jaejoong would be collecting his sass." Yunho pronounced as Jaejoong tried to flail himself upright, away from Yunho's hands.
"Yunho would collect his coins, hahahahah," Jaejoong announced from the bed as Yunho moved on to the next question.
"What would I eat every day if I could?" He set the paper down to look at the camera seriously as Jaejoong pat his shoulder when he finally sat up. "Jaejoong would eat squids."
"And Yunho would eat assholes," Jaejoong yelled as he hit his boyfriend on the arm, the other boy barely fazed as he looked at his boyfriend with a fond smile. "Only yours, boo."
Jaejoong sputtered as he made a loud buzzing sound. "Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut," he directed at the camera as Yunho grinned to himself in self-satisfaction.
"Okay, er Yunho would er, Yunho would eat strawberries everyday if he could." Jaejoong decided breezily as he squeezed his boyfriend's knee in warning, less he continued to say explicit things.
"Jaejoong would have my cooking every day if he could." Yunho decided as his boyfriend burst into sniggers.
"Yes," he laughed as he snuggled against the other. "A bit of a stretch, but I would, god knows why. It's frankly quite terrible despite the cooking lessons I've given him." He laughed as he kissed Yunho on the cheek. "It's really disgusting but it's okay because he tries so hard," he stated as he indicated for Yunho to move on to the next question with a loose smile.
"What is my favorite music," Yunho laughed breezily as Jaejoong raised an eyebrow at the camera.
"I cover a lot of songs with Yoochun and Junsu but both of us love dongbangshinki. Their ballads, man." He made an exploding gesture as he filled in the sound effects. "For all of you who have yet to look dongbangshinki up, look up Tonight at least. You'll be so hooked, man."
"Jumping ovaries," Yunho stated blankly before returning to his paper. "Who is my best friend?" He smirked as his boyfriend grinned back at him.
"Each other, plus Changmin, Yoochun and Junsu. Changmin is Yunho's exclusive bro, man." Jaejoong stated as he took the paper over.
"Okay, last question for the day! What is something I do that you don't like?" Jaejoong snorted as he looked into the camera. "Isn't it kind of similar as the previous question about arguments?"
"I don't like it when Jaejoong sleeps late because turning in late affects his cell regeneration and makes him less able to focus the next morning. As for Jaejoong, he doesn't like me caring for him." Yunho stated as he playfully shot a finger gun into the camera while his boyfriend sputtered in disagreement.
"I just don't like it when you creep and treat me like a child!" He protested as Yunho waved him off.
"Okay, so this has been Jaejoong's boyfriend tag with his main squeeze Jung Yunho and I hope that you guys have had as much fun as we did! Thumbs up-" he made the universal hand sign before arrowing down. "And subscribe to receive the latest video updates showcasing Jaejoong's ovary jumping voice as he harmonizes with prodigies Yoochun and Junsu. Leave a comment in the comments section whether you liked it, hated it, or you have any other songs that you would like us to cover. JYJ is also available on tumblr and Twitter, and you can check us out in the information section below."
Yunho waved to the camera with a smile. "This is the end of my video, and this has been Kim Jaejoong, peace out!" He sliced his hand through the air as Jaejoong gaped disbelievingly at the entire coherent sequence.
"Oh my god, how did you know that, creeper?"
Yunho ruffled his boyfriend's ruffled fondly as he twirled the list of questions in his hands. "I watch your videos, babe."
"You're gorgeously amazing," Jaejoong breathed out as he grabbed Yunho by the front of his shirt before launching a kiss on him as they tumbled onto the bed.
"Wait, the camera," Yunho reminded his boyfriend as Jaejoong groaned in protest.
"Let's film some porn, darling," Jaejoong suggested throatily as his boyfriend growled beneath him.
"Fine, fine!" Jaejoong surrendered unhappily as he sat up to switch the camera off with a slight wave. "Bye," he said brightly before pressing the save button.
"Come here, sweetheart," Jaejoong gestured coyly as he turned around impishly. Yelping when he instead fell onto the bed with a swift tug, Jaejoong sighed as the other trailed kisses along his neck while he carded adoringly through his boyfriend's hair.
- - - - -
"Yunho is an unf," Jaejoong read with a raised brow as Yunho hummed in acknowledgment without looking up from his notes.
"Babe, come here," he gestured as he leaned a pillow against the headboard for his boyfriend.
"I know those stuff already." Yunho voiced without moving an inch. "I am an unf," he looked up in dry amusement as Jaejoong bared his teeth in warning.
"I would totally bang Jaejoong, omg," he read out as Yunho growled under his breath. "Come here," he whined as he kicked his leg in mock tantrum.
Yunho cast his eyes skyward before getting up with a reluctant sigh. Beaming as he settled comfortably against his boyfriend, Jaejoong pushed the laptop to rest between them as he read the comments on the video.
"Oh, they say that you're whipped. But vice versa, man," Jaejoong laughed as his boyfriend pressed a kiss to his hair.
"Ugh, homophobic dumb asses," he groaned as he scrolled pass only to be halted by his boyfriend.
"Bunch of fags," Yunho read out with a frown before expanding the replies to the spiteful viewer. "Am I allowed to join the queue to shove his opinions up his ass?" Yunho sighed as he went down the page.
"Omy god, did you notice the jump at 0:33 and how pink Yunho was after????? Jaejoong is such a tease, omy god!!" Yunho repeated blankly as he pressed the time listing in confusion.
"Oh you look absolutely fetching in pink, darling," Jaejoong cooed as he rubbed his boyfriend's groin playfully. "It's so long," he sighed breathlessly only for Yunho to rut against the hand expressionlessly in jest.
Jaejoong laughed as he squeezed his boyfriend's hardening member in amusement before ignoring the hitch in the other's breath.
"I never knew I needed this in my life until now. Can I request for a cooking time?" He read out in confusion as he noticed the number of likes on the comment. Weren't they a singing channel?
"No cooking times, ever," Yunho said as he shifted his jeans to accommodate his slightly engorged length.
"Let's have a cooking time then," Jaejoong decided with an air of finality at the notice of Yunho's distress. "We'll have a couples cook off and Changmin will be the judge," he suggested, grinning when Yunho's brows raised in interest. Yunho would agree just for his special dongsaeng.
A few over excited comments interspersed with homophobic comments later, Jaejoong felt Yunho shift restlessly against him when he continued to laugh at the responses.
"Feeling okay down there?" He teased as Yunho blushed in response.
"My dick isn't getting how inappropriate the timing is." Yunho mumbled as he pressed down roughly at his genitals.
"Don't hurt the baby!" Jaejoong yelped, hitting his boyfriend's violent hand away as he massaged the outline tenderly, feeling it harden in interest while he ignored Yunho's indignant scoff.
"Come, let me take care of it," Jaejoong decided as he shut the laptop before getting up to kneel before his boyfriend as he undid the straining zipper.
Groaning as his boyfriend's cold hand cupped his genitals lightly before squeezing them softly, Yunho pushed his jeans off his hips in desperation just as Jaejoong pressed an open-mouthed kiss to his dickhead. Moaning as Jaejoong began to make kitten licks on the spongy engorged crown of his penis while running his hand up and down his length, Yunho tried desperately to control the urge to thrust into Jaejoong's mouth.
Humming as he licked the familiar bitter taste of Yunho's precome with his tongue before coating them over Yunho's girth, Jaejoong moved to suck on Yunho's tightening balls as he ran his thumb around the rosy weeping tip of Yunho's swollen sex, feeling the small concaved slit along the smooth crown.
Luxuriating on the noises he was pulling out from his boyfriend, Jaejoong slid his mouth slowly over his boyfriend's erected dick as he relaxed his throat in preparation. Humming as he felt the light pressure against the back, he began to move quickly, his mouth wet and sloppy around the fat meat.
Well versed in his lover's preference, Jaejoong massaged Yunho's balls while he swirled around Yunho's tip with his tongue as he stroked the length with his lips. Speeding up when he felt Yunho's legs tighten around him, he felt the jump of Yunho's balls in his hands as his boyfriend moaned wantonly as he orgasmed.
Slurping on the penis as he swallowed the release enthusiastically, Yunho groaned in genuine physical pain when Jaejoong surfaced with a filthy lick of his lips.
Gesturing for Jaejoong bonelessly, Yunho kissed his boyfriend deeply as he chased the foreign muskiness in Jaejoong's swollen mouth.
"I love you," Yunho whispered as his boyfriend laid down beside him, pouting when Jaejoong shook his head when he reached for the other boy's zipper.
Never mind the numerous confirmations, Jaejoong thought as he gazed into Yunho's brown eyes adoringly. He knew personally above everyone else how lucky he was to have someone so precious in his life worth fighting for.
- - - - -
A/N: Boyfriend tag questions edited from here.
So many mistakes, not even funny. Hit me if you find them and leave a comment if you liked it bc idk,